01 December 2009
How Mother Nature Interfered with my Marriage
So my husband decides to go with my son to his cousin's house and I get all emotional. Then he's there for an hour and I get mad, so I call him up and tell him that he doesn't care about his family and that I'm taking the kids and moving to my mom's house. My husband comes home and, like the amazing man he is, tries to comfort me and like the emotional mess I was, I push him away. I end up calming down a day or two later and realize that I was totally over reacting for no reason...and then this morning I make my routine visit to the bathroom and saw that my "monthly monster" is here. My poor husband. It wasn't him, it was me...
20 November 2009
Be the Bigger Person
If there's anything harder in an argument than to say, "you're right"...please, let me know. It comes down to wondering if you want it to get uglier or do you just want to get to the situation at hand and fix it. When the other person is so fixed in their rage that all they do is attack, attack, attack, try changing their response by giving them one they won't be expecting. "Kill them with kindness" so to speak. Responding to personal cuts with more personal cuts only makes the fire hotter...instead of, "well your mom is a @#$%^" try, I'm sorry, I didn't know you felt that way...You aren't saying sorry for being wrong, you're saying sorry for not understanding. Being the bigger person is the most difficult thing to do in an argument...you may feel like its a show of weekness, but in the long run, you've just saved your relationship by humbling yourself which is a major STRENGTH!
10 November 2009
Argument or WAR?
When I met my current husband, I asked my self if I was willing to walk through hell for this man. But I feel that the more important question was, do I know in my heart that this man will walk through hell for me? What good is a relationship if you feel that you're not loved by the other person?
One of the things that I've learned in my marriages is that if you're BOTH willing to endure the trials TOGETHER then there's nothing that can stand in your way. And with God on your side ANYTHING is possible.
A relationship wouldn't be the same without conflict. The way you resolve these conflicts can make a big impact on your future in the relationship. An important thing to remember is that you love this person so you don't want to hurt them. Another thing is that arguing to rub it in the other person's face isn't going to help the conflict. Arguments shouldn't be treated as a WAR but instead as a discussion to resolve conflict. The key to a good and productive argument is RESPECT. Listen to your partner and kindly let them know your point of view. NEVER make big decisions when you're angry. Talk it through...COMMUNICATE, COMMUNICATE, COMMUNICATE...did you get that???
One of the things that I've learned in my marriages is that if you're BOTH willing to endure the trials TOGETHER then there's nothing that can stand in your way. And with God on your side ANYTHING is possible.
A relationship wouldn't be the same without conflict. The way you resolve these conflicts can make a big impact on your future in the relationship. An important thing to remember is that you love this person so you don't want to hurt them. Another thing is that arguing to rub it in the other person's face isn't going to help the conflict. Arguments shouldn't be treated as a WAR but instead as a discussion to resolve conflict. The key to a good and productive argument is RESPECT. Listen to your partner and kindly let them know your point of view. NEVER make big decisions when you're angry. Talk it through...COMMUNICATE, COMMUNICATE, COMMUNICATE...did you get that???
Life after the "D" word
After my ex left I decided to give myself some time to "mourn". I knew that if I got all my crying and anger out at once, when I did start dating again it would be because I was ready to move on. Not because I wanted to get back at my ex.
I started dating again about 4 months later. It was confusing and exciting at the same time. Of course it was new and scary, but I knew I wanted the experience. I dated a lot of different guys to get a feel of what I really wanted in a significant other. I dated so much, my family started joking around asking me what the "flavor of the month" was. While dating, I came to the conclusion that I didn't want a significant other. I was okay with dating with no long term commitments. I wasn't looking for a husband or a "baby daddy" I just wanted "arm candy" hahaha.
I didn't expect to meet someone who would change my life and my view on men, but I did and it's been great.
There is life after the D word, and for some it's a better one. I'm not saying that the grass is greener on the other side. I'm saying that when someone leaves you, it's not the end of the world.
I started dating again about 4 months later. It was confusing and exciting at the same time. Of course it was new and scary, but I knew I wanted the experience. I dated a lot of different guys to get a feel of what I really wanted in a significant other. I dated so much, my family started joking around asking me what the "flavor of the month" was. While dating, I came to the conclusion that I didn't want a significant other. I was okay with dating with no long term commitments. I wasn't looking for a husband or a "baby daddy" I just wanted "arm candy" hahaha.
I didn't expect to meet someone who would change my life and my view on men, but I did and it's been great.
There is life after the D word, and for some it's a better one. I'm not saying that the grass is greener on the other side. I'm saying that when someone leaves you, it's not the end of the world.
28 October 2009
My "Rough Draft" Marriage
I remember knowing it all in high school. I knew so much, I graduated, got pregnant and got married in the same year. I laugh now, but back then it wasn't too funny.
My marriage was odd. I don't know how else to describe it, and since I have a good relationship with my ex-husband I'm going to leave it at that. I had two kids in this marriage and my ex-husband ended up leaving to be with someone else.
We tried everything to make it work, but I think we were so much alike that there was no advancement in our relationship.
When we got married, we were young and had no idea that what we really wanted was to be taken care of. We didn't know how to take care of ourselves, how were we supposed to take care of each other? In the last general conference Henry B Eyring said, "The ideal God holds for us is to form families in the way most likely to lead to happiness and away from sorrow. A man and a woman are to make sacred covenants that they will put the welfare and happiness of the other at the center of their lives." I believe there wasn't enough maturity in this marriage so it ended the way that it did.
Of course at the end of any relationship, there is tension. Luckily after some hard work and communication we're at a point where we can focus on what's best for the kids.
My marriage was odd. I don't know how else to describe it, and since I have a good relationship with my ex-husband I'm going to leave it at that. I had two kids in this marriage and my ex-husband ended up leaving to be with someone else.
We tried everything to make it work, but I think we were so much alike that there was no advancement in our relationship.
When we got married, we were young and had no idea that what we really wanted was to be taken care of. We didn't know how to take care of ourselves, how were we supposed to take care of each other? In the last general conference Henry B Eyring said, "The ideal God holds for us is to form families in the way most likely to lead to happiness and away from sorrow. A man and a woman are to make sacred covenants that they will put the welfare and happiness of the other at the center of their lives." I believe there wasn't enough maturity in this marriage so it ended the way that it did.
Of course at the end of any relationship, there is tension. Luckily after some hard work and communication we're at a point where we can focus on what's best for the kids.
My past
"There are great lessons to be learned from the past, and you ought to learn them so that you don’t exhaust your spiritual strength repeating past mistakes and bad choices." ~ M Russell Ballard
I got married out of high school. I had two kids to that marriage and was divorced by 21. I met my current husband a little after my divorce and have been with him since.
Of course there is more to the story so I'll be spilling my guts out here.
I know we've all heard the saying, "I wish I knew then, what I know now," but the truth is, I wouldn't change my experiences if I could. What I've gone through has made me into who I've become. Of course I didn't do it all alone. I could make a whole list but I know that if I've met you or have had any contact, whether it be a smile, a "hello", or even just leaving a comment on myspace, you've made an impact in my life. Even if no one ever reads my blogs, I want to put my story somewhere and until my kids learn not to rip mommy's journal, my life will be here.
I got married out of high school. I had two kids to that marriage and was divorced by 21. I met my current husband a little after my divorce and have been with him since.
Of course there is more to the story so I'll be spilling my guts out here.
I know we've all heard the saying, "I wish I knew then, what I know now," but the truth is, I wouldn't change my experiences if I could. What I've gone through has made me into who I've become. Of course I didn't do it all alone. I could make a whole list but I know that if I've met you or have had any contact, whether it be a smile, a "hello", or even just leaving a comment on myspace, you've made an impact in my life. Even if no one ever reads my blogs, I want to put my story somewhere and until my kids learn not to rip mommy's journal, my life will be here.
What to do...what to do....
I've been racking my brain on what I wanted to blog about. Everyone has their own thing like couponing, professional photography, etc. so I wanted to do a blog that I am passionate about. I love to coupon, but I do it because I have to. I love to photograph, but I haven't started on a career yet.
I'm helping one of my best friends plan her wedding. It's super fun and there isn't anyone I would rather do it for, but I've noticed some things in their beginning that I know I wish I knew in mine. So what I've decided to devote MOST of my blog to is relationships. I've been giving advice for more than 10 years and I love being able to help where I can. Of course, I'm not a doctor or a therapist, but I do know enough about people to know I know what I'm talking about. I doubt anyone would read this anyway, and IF you do, I hope this helps. I'm open to suggestions and I take criticism as needed so opinions are welcomed.
I'm helping one of my best friends plan her wedding. It's super fun and there isn't anyone I would rather do it for, but I've noticed some things in their beginning that I know I wish I knew in mine. So what I've decided to devote MOST of my blog to is relationships. I've been giving advice for more than 10 years and I love being able to help where I can. Of course, I'm not a doctor or a therapist, but I do know enough about people to know I know what I'm talking about. I doubt anyone would read this anyway, and IF you do, I hope this helps. I'm open to suggestions and I take criticism as needed so opinions are welcomed.
15 October 2009
Killin some time
It's been a while since i've posted, but since nobody ever reads this anyway, i guess it doesn't really matter.
Things are getting crazy at the Iosua-Hall house and i don't know what to do. I'm just waiting for the day it'll all be over so I can put it on my "been there done that" list. You know the one that helps you know that even though it was rough, I survived and it'll only get better.
Can someone hit the FF button on the DVD to my life? Thank you!
Things are getting crazy at the Iosua-Hall house and i don't know what to do. I'm just waiting for the day it'll all be over so I can put it on my "been there done that" list. You know the one that helps you know that even though it was rough, I survived and it'll only get better.
Can someone hit the FF button on the DVD to my life? Thank you!
11 September 2009
If you're in the area
Stansbury Stallions fundraiser. Car wash at the Lakepoint McDonald's. Go on I-80 and take to Tooele/Stansbury exit. McDonald's is on your right.
15 August 2009
***********FOODOLOGY***************
What is your salad dressing of choice?
Vinegarette (not sure how to spell that one, but i know it taste good!)
What is your favorite sit-down restaurant?
Chili'z!!
Food could you eat every day for two weeks and not get sick of?
Spicy Shrimp Salad @ Chili'z MMMMmmmm!!!
What are your pizza toppings of choice?
Pineapple with no sauce
What do you like to put on your toast?
Butter!
***********TECHNOLOGY***************
How many televisions are in your house?
Just 3 lol
What color is your cellphone?
ROYAL BLuE!
Do you have an iPod?
Nope.
***************BIOLOGY******************
Are you right-handed or left-handed?
Right when I need to write...Left when i need to sasa! lol
Have you ever had anything removed from your body?
Ummm yuk! oh yeah, my 6 chitlins.
What is the last heavy item you lifted?
I'm a queen, I don't lift heavy things...lol
Have you ever been knocked unconscious?
No, but I used to play a game with Kalo where we made each other black out lol...issues!
************BULLOLOGY**************
If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die?
No...well maybe...umm no!
If you could change your name, what would you change it to?
I love my name...!!
Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1000?
Heck yeah!! Shoot, I'll do it for $100...i luv me some hawt sauce...weh, I mean the sauce i promise!! lol
**************FAVORITOLOGY****************
Season?
Fall, or is it Autumn? who knows...
Holiday?
Labor Day!
Day of the week?
Wednesday!!
Month?
October...
***********CURRENTOLOGY*****************
Missing someone?
My husband, he's always working...
And Siupeli nd Jadyn, won't see them for another week :(
Mood?
Anxious! I have a million things to do and I'm stuck on this survey!
What are you listening to?
Harry Potter
Current worry?
My kids being safe
***************RANDOMOLOGY*****************
First place you went this morning?
To the bathroom...where do u go first thing in the morning?? lol
Last Movie you watched In a theater?
UP in 3D...it was aight!
Last movie watched at home?
Harry Potter
***************OTHEROLOGY*****************
How many pairs of flip flops do you own?
Two...they keep getting jacked!
Last time you had a run-in with the cops?
last week. my dumb insurance company keeps forgetting to put us in the system >:(
Last person you talked to?
My sis Mahina
Last person you hugged?
Kauaki, he smacked himself in the head with the vacuum parts
Do you always answer your phone?
Yup!
It's 4 in the morning and you get a text message, who is it?
Nanise bragging about how her date went lol...(yeah girl i put u on blast!)
If you could change your eye color what would it be?
BLACK...
Do you own a digital camera?
Yes
Have you ever had a pet fish?
If having it for only a day counts, then yes
Favorite Christmas song(s)?
It's Cold Outside ( the version from ELF )
What's on your wish list for your birthday?
I don't have birthdays anymore...Forever 25!!
Can you do push ups?
"ups" as in plural??? nope!
Can you do the splits?
When I was like...5!
Does the future make you more nervous or excited?
excited!
Do you have any saved texts?
yeah
Have you ever been in a car accident?
yup, my fault, don't wanna talk about it!
Do you have an accent?
Depends on who I'm talking to
What is the last movie to make you cry?
The Color Purple.
Plans tonight?
BBQ if it don't rain
Have you ever felt like you hit rock bottom?
Yup
Name 3 things you bought yesterday?
Just three? i coupon...i cnt buy just 3 of anything
Have you ever been given roses?
Yes.
Met someone who changed your life?
Yes. my kids
What song represents you?
Banana Pancakes...lol
Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?
No.
Have you ever dated someone longer than a year?
just my husband.
Do you have any tattoos/piercings?
Only piercings, my ears.
Does anyone love you?
They better lol.
Would you be a pirate?
For the treasure.
What songs do you sing in the shower?
Yesterday I sang I need thee every hour cuz i just got done watching Haunting in Conneticut
Ever had someone sing to you?
Yes.
When did you last cry?
Last time I was on my ma'i...them hormones are no joke...
Do you like to cuddle?
Sure do.
Have you held hands with anyone today?
Yep, my love
Are most of the friends in your life new or old?
Both.
Do you like pulpy orange juice?
love it!!
What is something your friends make fun of you for?
what DON'T my friends clown on me for???that's just how it is...
What is your salad dressing of choice?
Vinegarette (not sure how to spell that one, but i know it taste good!)
What is your favorite sit-down restaurant?
Chili'z!!
Food could you eat every day for two weeks and not get sick of?
Spicy Shrimp Salad @ Chili'z MMMMmmmm!!!
What are your pizza toppings of choice?
Pineapple with no sauce
What do you like to put on your toast?
Butter!
***********TECHNOLOGY*****
How many televisions are in your house?
Just 3 lol
What color is your cellphone?
ROYAL BLuE!
Do you have an iPod?
Nope.
***************BIOLOGY****
Are you right-handed or left-handed?
Right when I need to write...Left when i need to sasa! lol
Have you ever had anything removed from your body?
Ummm yuk! oh yeah, my 6 chitlins.
What is the last heavy item you lifted?
I'm a queen, I don't lift heavy things...lol
Have you ever been knocked unconscious?
No, but I used to play a game with Kalo where we made each other black out lol...issues!
************BULLOLOGY*****
If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die?
No...well maybe...umm no!
If you could change your name, what would you change it to?
I love my name...!!
Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1000?
Heck yeah!! Shoot, I'll do it for $100...i luv me some hawt sauce...weh, I mean the sauce i promise!! lol
**************FAVORITOLOGY
Season?
Fall, or is it Autumn? who knows...
Holiday?
Labor Day!
Day of the week?
Wednesday!!
Month?
October...
***********CURRENTOLOGY***
Missing someone?
My husband, he's always working...
And Siupeli nd Jadyn, won't see them for another week :(
Mood?
Anxious! I have a million things to do and I'm stuck on this survey!
What are you listening to?
Harry Potter
Current worry?
My kids being safe
***************RANDOMOLOGY
First place you went this morning?
To the bathroom...where do u go first thing in the morning?? lol
Last Movie you watched In a theater?
UP in 3D...it was aight!
Last movie watched at home?
Harry Potter
***************OTHEROLOGY*
How many pairs of flip flops do you own?
Two...they keep getting jacked!
Last time you had a run-in with the cops?
last week. my dumb insurance company keeps forgetting to put us in the system >:(
Last person you talked to?
My sis Mahina
Last person you hugged?
Kauaki, he smacked himself in the head with the vacuum parts
Do you always answer your phone?
Yup!
It's 4 in the morning and you get a text message, who is it?
Nanise bragging about how her date went lol...(yeah girl i put u on blast!)
If you could change your eye color what would it be?
BLACK...
Do you own a digital camera?
Yes
Have you ever had a pet fish?
If having it for only a day counts, then yes
Favorite Christmas song(s)?
It's Cold Outside ( the version from ELF )
What's on your wish list for your birthday?
I don't have birthdays anymore...Forever 25!!
Can you do push ups?
"ups" as in plural??? nope!
Can you do the splits?
When I was like...5!
Does the future make you more nervous or excited?
excited!
Do you have any saved texts?
yeah
Have you ever been in a car accident?
yup, my fault, don't wanna talk about it!
Do you have an accent?
Depends on who I'm talking to
What is the last movie to make you cry?
The Color Purple.
Plans tonight?
BBQ if it don't rain
Have you ever felt like you hit rock bottom?
Yup
Name 3 things you bought yesterday?
Just three? i coupon...i cnt buy just 3 of anything
Have you ever been given roses?
Yes.
Met someone who changed your life?
Yes. my kids
What song represents you?
Banana Pancakes...lol
Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?
No.
Have you ever dated someone longer than a year?
just my husband.
Do you have any tattoos/piercings?
Only piercings, my ears.
Does anyone love you?
They better lol.
Would you be a pirate?
For the treasure.
What songs do you sing in the shower?
Yesterday I sang I need thee every hour cuz i just got done watching Haunting in Conneticut
Ever had someone sing to you?
Yes.
When did you last cry?
Last time I was on my ma'i...them hormones are no joke...
Do you like to cuddle?
Sure do.
Have you held hands with anyone today?
Yep, my love
Are most of the friends in your life new or old?
Both.
Do you like pulpy orange juice?
love it!!
What is something your friends make fun of you for?
what DON'T my friends clown on me for???that's just how it is...
14 August 2009
Brain Dead
It's the middle of the night and I'm working on a paper due in 8 minutes. Seeing that I won't be making this deadline I've decided to rant on about jibberish. Well, maybe not. Maybe I can jibber jabber on my paper and hand it in on time to see how much of a grade I'll get.
Wish me luck!
10 August 2009
Yay! My first post!
Good things happen to those who wait. As for me? I took the long way around to the good stuff, but am relieved to say that it's good to be here. I'm not rich, I'm not a CEO, but I'm happily sealed to my eternal companion and we have A LOT of amazing kids. Yes, of course, we have our problems but it's comforting to know that we work things through together. I've got to admit, he's the level headed one that calms things down in a heated argument. He always turns everything into a "discussion" and always, always makes sure that our end result leaves me happy. I guess I can say I'm spoiled.
Well, I was planning on writing a novel for my first entry, but I have too much wash to do so...FA!
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